post-semester thoughts.

I got home on Monday night for a month long break from school. Home, Good cooking, Brothers, My old high school, my own bed (that does not require I climb into it such as the one at school) and time with old friends came at a perfect time. But it wasn't until last night (And 6 1/2 pages of a journal later) that I realized just how significant these past few months were. Everyone always says you meet people in college who change your life, people who will be in your wedding, and years down the road your children will find themselves required to send a graduation announcement to.....but just exactly HOW you get that close to people, I still don't know. And just who the people in my life (and the ones I have yet to meet) that will become like that to me, I still don't know. I know my way around school, around the new and very relaxed routine (sounds like an oxymoron to have a relaxed routine), and have adjusted being away FAR better than I first imagined. I have begun to let go of some of the things I was weary of holding in-and have begun to branch out so to speak. Spend time with people I wouldn't 'normally' hang out with. Because, there's something inside of me that has changed when I look at people. Not saying I don't dislike some people or something, but we are a generation desperate. For hope, for love, for peace, for something different. For a friendship with someone who can point us in the right direction. So now as I look across my school, I have begun to look at people--all the KINDS of people--with the idea in mind that they are desperate. Needy. Searching for something. I mean, I am. I didn't realize just how much I needed and was searching until this semester. I am far from having it ALL figured out, but I am a step ahead of some people, I have matured in my faith and in other ways that not alot of people have by their first year of college, not because I'm better, but because I see now why it's that way. God has sent me to set captives free. to bring joy to darkness. to show mercy to those who are merciless. And that is what Spring will be focused on---DOING. I am equipped to do things, and will praise God for the many doors He has opened. I will grasp and use the people He has sent to be that for me too. To help me find His forgiveness, joy, and healing. That's what this is about. This part of my life. Being who He wants me to be. Ahead, I see marriage. And ahead I see being a teacher and things, but I'm not there yet. I need this time, because when I am back to school, I know what must change. God is so good to me---so gracious to know my apathy and complacency towards Him and His Word and has freshly reminded me that He loves me just the same, that He has forgiven, and that He will continue to be everything to me. I am blessed.