i've been struggling with how i'm supposed to handle my health situation.

people are so quick to tell you how to handle your life when they aren't the ones who have to walk the road you have to walk...

and to be honest, being told to 'pray about it and it'll be fine' is not the complete truth.

yes, God will grant me grace. yes, God will help me.

BUT Jesus wept. Jesus wept when Lazarus died, even though He KNEW that he was going to be raised. He wept. He's not okay with my situation, even though He knows the deliverance (whatever way that is... treatment, surgery, death even...) that is going to come for me...

So...

please don't tell me to pray and everything will be great.

Because it's not great.

But I will pray...

And believe that Jesus is hurting for me too.